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The Right to Remain Stupid

12 Sep, 2010 //Blog //

Thanks to a plethora of TV courtroom dramas, we are all aware of the essence of the 5th Amendment giving us the “Right to Remain Silent”.  It’s intent was to protect individuals from self incrimination, although, truthfully, I’ve never understood why we need to be protected from ourselves.  It seems, however, that apart from interrogative manipulation, public figures, (and by “public” I mean any asshole who can get more than five people to listen to him/her), have disdained the 5th and opted for the un-numbered, yet much more popular, Amendment guaranteeing “The Right to Remain Stupid”.

I have prepared for the use of the ‘S’ word by amassing several rolls of quarters to fill the “inappropriate language” jars of my grandchildren.  I seriously tried to find a gentler, less inflammatory adjective, but sometimes you just have to call a spade a stupid spade.

  • Terry Jones, (why are so many lunatics named Jones?) – just plain stupid.
  • Anyone in the media that reported on Terry Jones – just as stupid.
  • Our tax code – inefficient, inequitable and stupid.
  • Texting, phoning, reading, preparing snacks, (even nutritious ones), being drunk or stoned while driving – fatally stupid.
  • Thinking that Republicans will help the economy – FUNDamentally STUPID!
  • Thinking that the economy matters if we don’t get our shit together and stop devastating the Earth – S-T-U-P-I-D!!!
  • Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, Jan Brewer – (by definition…I looked it up, really), stupid.
  • 18% of Americans, due to lack of education – sadly stupid.
  • Drilling, mining, burning and worshipping fossil fuel – deeply stupid.
  • All of that packaging and shrink-wrapping that you have to wrestle, (often unsuccessfully), to open – wasteful and stupid.
  • The notion that building a mosque is somehow more detrimental to the public welfare than, say, a Starbuck’s or MacDonald’s – MONUMENTally stupid.
  • 3D TV – stupiD-stupiD-stupiD!
  • Reaganomics, deregulation, NAFTA – trickle-down stupid.
  • Outsourcing – बेवकूफ, (Hindi for ‘stupid’)
  • Lobbying – because they think we’re stupid.
  • Smoking – fucking stupid!
  • Intolerance – intolerably stupid.
  • “It’s the economy, Stupid!” – NO, it’s not!  It’s stupidity, moron!