The only instance that comes to mind, where one’s aspirations for the lowest bar would signal a tendency for positive achievement, would be the Limbo.  Other than that mainstay of Calypso revelry at beach parties, bar mitzvahs and various gatherings where live or DJ-ed music is featured, not so much.

Certainly, there are way too many past and present examples of dastardly deeds by global despots whose motivations could never be categorized as morally or humanely lofty, but in the USA, whether their politics or policies seemed sound or proved beneficial, forty-four of our Presidents, (I defer the totality of this assertion to more scholarly historians who may enumerate otherwise), used that office with an intent and desire to raise the above-titled metaphor.  Then along came POTUS 45.  I posit that his pre-presidential experience is so abysmally low by most standards, that he may actually embrace, in his twittery befuddlement, the notion that his presidential actions are magnanimous in comparison.  Yet, he has surrounded himself with henchmen, (that should be henchpeople lest Kellyanne or Betsy be thought any less hench), that rival the worst comic book baddies of all time, each surgically vetted to destroy anything positive in the areas and agencies they have been chosen to steward.  He has fully embraced the playbook of his mentor, Roy Cohn, attacking the media and any group or individual that doesn’t applaud his uninformed nonsense.  And, most disturbingly, Republican leaders, (whose bar has been literally lying on the floor for years), are riding the runaway Trump train, I assume, hoping to sneak through some of their Conservative, crack-induced, planet-ending legislation.

Here’s why I’m scared shitless.  Last Tuesday evening, a nearly illiterate asshole who somehow won, (please, somebody wake me and tell me it didn’t actually happen), the Presidency, made his first address to a joint session of Congress.  All of the buzz leading up to the speech was about which Donald would show up.  (Just for the record, there is only one, and he believes in only one thing…his blubbery, spray-tanned, henna-headed self).  Nothing informative or substantive was revealed.  He blustered and bragged, pushed applause-inducing buttons and then proceeded to do the most shameless limbo dance…ever, using the unfathomable grief of Carryn Owens to feign his compassion…for twelve cruel minutes…in a self-congratulatory cover up to his failed Seal mission.  I was offended by the action and more so by the response to it, particularly from some of his harshest media critics, (Van Jones), saying that this, made him seem, for the first time, Presidential, when in fact, only a slimy, unconscionable snake could have ever slithered under that bar.